Now what?

Gone are the days when you could control your bowels and bladder, now you don’t even realize when you are wet. How sad it is to watch a loved one or anybody deteriorate as such. Gone are the days when you could eat and enjoy a juicy grilled steak, now your taste buds are gone and your dentures can’t take a good bite at the food. Gone are the days when you could pick the clothes that you like and dress yourself and even groom yourself, now your hands are contructured and so painful to move that you have to depend on somebody to do it. It is pitiful to loose function of your limbs. All of a sudden you become prisoner of your own body. Gone are the days when you enjoyed dressing up and putting on make up, now your skin is wrinkled and paper thin and your body either wasted away or obese. You wish you could escape from what you have no control over or you could go back to when you were in your early 40s or late 50s. Some wish death to come over them. Life is a gift from God. Cherish it when you can. Life is really too short to sulk in it, instead try to make the most of each moment so that you could be able to look back and smile at the gone days and look forward to happy final days.

Let’s talk about sex

Whatever happens behind closed bedroom doors is largely dependent on the strength of a relationship. You have heard of women complaining of men that can’t go for over three minutes and of course men complaining of women that fake orgasms. Study shows that over 70% of women have faked one. True or false, it certainly boosts our ego. Besides these problems, one of the two or even both of them ends up looking for greener pastures.
Here are tips to becoming a self proclaimed guru. I have personally tried all and more that I decide to keep to myself. I approve of all of them. Now, first of all you need to be able to define your relationship. Without going any further, here is what is missing in many relationships. Romance! To all the men that are reading this post, you must acknowledge that women love to be cared for and given attention. The same way you polish your car, or the same amount of hours you put in your job, a woman wants all of that. It might be too late but I don’t want to paint the picture of a relationship as hardwork but fun. Relationships are fun. And yes you can have romance without finance.
Find something you like about your partner and let them know that you adore it. It might be the way they smile that brings chills to your body or just how they sound. Hold hands and stare into each other’s eyes and confess your feelings. It does not have to be at an expensive hotel. Instead, save the money and buy her a sexy, red, lingerie from victoria’s secret and let her don it and praise her curves as she gets into it.
Take a minute from work to call her just to say you thought about her and can’t wait to get off so you can see her. If possible sneak from work to get a hot quicky. Remember to freshen up before going back to work.
Spontaneous sex is the best sex. Get into the behavior of practising sponataneous sex, at the same time safe sex. When sex is so obvious it ruins the excitement. Work your way down. Talking dirty to each other might get you heated up as well. Get started up by saying the things you could do to her (you should be able to fulfill each one of them).
Once the air is hot and you are all breathing fast and your palms are sweaty that might be the green light. Kiss her like you have never before and let your tongue swim inside of her mouth. Lock your lips as hard as you can and then just whisk her away and without warning her quickly take her pants down. The feeling is fulfilling and this might be the most precious 3 minutes of your life.

Brain power

Do you ever take a second to ask yourself how in the world did somebody come up with that or just how did somebody ever figure that out. I believe we all have so much untapped energy and ideas just waiting to be initiated. If it is true that we only use a small percentage of our brains then how much more could we do if we used only another small percentage of the remaining. It’s certainly interesting and amazing how little ideas grow into big inventions. For instance look at how telephones came to being. Alexander Bell, whose wife and mother were deaf influenced his invention of the telephone. He became interested in learning how hearing occurs and thus the telephone was invented.
It seems to me wherever there is a lot of pondering, there is something being created. If you saw a need for something and you passionately wanted to solve it, in the end you sure will. If only we could manually manipulate our brains we could do things that defy rules of nature. Here is one impressive invention. In order for you to see it for yourself just go to
Going an extra mile makes a huge difference to what already exists. It takes determination and the will to go on. You could make a difference wherever you are. It may not have to appear on the news in order to ger recognition but as long as a you are satisfied and driven to do more and greater things, then you are certainly in the right path.
Final words: Challenge yourself and put your brain to work. Do not limit yourself, instead trust your inner voice. Make a difference, change the world. Yes you can do it.

Real talk

Have you ever wondered to yourself why many human relationships do not last long? Or why is it that there is so much fighting amongst us? Do not be fooled by the friendly smile at a lunch date with a so called friend. All they might be doing is trying to dig some dirt from you. A few days later the whole town might be knowing about you. Gossip spreads like bush fire. Be very watchful of such friends. Their tongues are like matches ready to ignite a fire. You might think you have found a friend you could rely on and trust with all your secrets. Not too fast.
I am the friendly type and once you meet me you will realize that very quickly. My mother always used to warn me from trusting people too quickly. But I never realized the danger of it until something I had said to a friend whom I had trusted came back having been blown out of its proportion. It now made sense to me why everytime I was around people that I knew, they gave me the ugly looks and did not want to talk to me. Little did I know that what I had said to my friend long time ago had finally surfaced. But the way I heard it is not the way I had said it. My mother’s words slowly started coming back to me.
As much as we are social beings, we tend to break the rules of true friendship. I consider myself a true friend but I don’t like to hear all about my friend’s life. Of course I am more than happy to offer a crying shoulder and help whenever I could but if only you didn’t tell too much. Don’t get me wrong but your secrets are safe with me. Does that make you feel better? Nobody should be so content with somebody else knowing so much about them with the exception of a married couple. Even married couples break the rules sometimes especially when they argue and they each go to seek solace in somebody else. I know what you are thinking but don’t you go there. Do not tell your friend about what just went on between you and your spouse lest you be on the front page of the Daily Iowan. Then who could you trust? Call it absurd but your only true friend is Jesus Christ. He only wants to really help you. He does not need to know your problems so He could tell Tom, Dick, and Harry about. No! He truly wants to help you.
I choose my friends wisely now, I watch what I speak I just don’t bluster words, I don’t pay attention to other peoples’ gossip as it does not do me any good neither does it add or decrease anything in my life. If so and so just bought a private jet, good for them just keep driving your little Kia, if so and so just got arrested for dealing drugs, well sorry but life has to move on. See you on the other side of the bars. If you feel like this is about you… Maybe it is and if you agree with it then the truth has to be told.

Must do…

Life is unpredictable. Regardless of the plans we make life always throws curveballs at us that changes the direction of our lives. This is the thrill of life. Of  course if we knew what the future held life wouldn’t have been fun living. But the twists and turns of life worth living and looking forward for tomorrow. That’s the adventure of life. Many years ago a group of us made plans to go camping in Hell’s gate, Naivasha in Kenya. It was everything you could imagine in a camp. Long walks in the hot scorching sun, wild animals, and a lot of site seeing. It was beautiful. We walked close to 10 miles where our camp site was and had a little picnic when we arrived and told funny stories and just laughed the day out. Oh how I miss those days. But all that fun had to come to a stop when the sun was almost setting and we had to start our 10 mile walk before dark. Although we had the map back, we suddenly got lost along the way. Darkness had caught up with us and yet none of us had cell phones. Our transportation back home was supposed to meet us up in the road at a certain time but we were so late that they had to leave. Parents were scared for our lives and thought about all the wild things that could have happened to us in Hell’s gate. Well I wasn’t worried, and so was the rest of the crew. We were having the time of our lives. We were happy about this twist. It meant we had to hang out longer with each other. Finally after walking close to 18 miles back we came to the road but we didn’t recognize it. At this time the only light we had was the stars and the moon but it was not enough. There were no cars driving by and it was starting to get really cold. We had to figure something out quickly. We tried holding each other but it was not long before the angry breeze broke us apart. Luckily one of us had matches and so we all decided to gather some brushes and pieces of wood and make a fire. Once we had gathered enough we started our big camp fire which lasted us through the morning. It was wonderful to be alive again. But that was a night to remember. Morning came and we had to embark on our walk to find a transportation to the city. A hot cup of tea for breakfast was all we needed before we hopped into the vehicle and say goodbye to Hell’s gate.
That was a risk worth taking. You definitely come to realize that life itself is a risk. There is so much to learn along the way. Life is too short to do the same things over and over and not trying new things. Why be too cautious? Why be very meticulous? How about just jump in the wagon and go? Let life take its course and be thankful for it. Next time somebody tells me to go bungee jumping I am in, deep sea diving, count me in.

Christmas is here.

Christmas is getting close and here I am thousands of miles from those I call family. Of course I have made new friends and family here but it just does not feel the same. I remember growing up when we would all sit down around our big dining table and eat together as family. My mother would cook some delicious meals, I can almost taste each one of them as I am writing. The sweet aroma in the kitchen that would keep everyone from going anywhere far from home still lingers in the back of my head. Then she would serve it with love and a perfect smile on her face. That’s what I call love. Everyone would look forward to dig into their food but not without a word of prayer and thanksgiving. While holding hands and all eyes closed, the sweet soothing voice of my mother would raise and say a prayer then the feast would begin. How I look forward for only one of those days when all nine of us including mom and dad would sit down together and just be merry and talk throughout the day then visit with other relatives.

Family is the most important thing. I thank God for keeping each one of us alive and I just want to say that I love each one of them for they have made me the man that I am today. Although they might not be here I believe one of these days we shall be able to sit down together and have one of those merry merry christmas meals that we used to have years ago before life separated us.

Merry christmas to all!

Take a minute

Every day that we live is a miracle we experience.  I like to encourage people to count their blessings and name them one by one. We never get to live today twice. Surely we can whine about riding a bus to work or not driving a ferrari like Justin Bieber or any other celebrity but somebody else somewhere is not asking for all the fancy cars. They are only asking to get from point A to B. They are only asking for a couple quarters so they can ride the trolley or bus. I believe we are where we are for reasons we can only begin to understand and appreciate when we live one day at a time. Make memories of each day, week, month or year. Take photos and enjoy the free breath of air with family and friends. Critically ill people wish they could only get out of life support and breathe on their own. The crippled wish they could only take one step on their feet. Walk in the rain, and play in the snow, take some time to call your relatives on the phone and just say hi and just breathe. Truly the simple things in life are free and the best. There are so many stressors around us now that we forget the true essence of life. You really want to know how worth life could be?… Stop complaining and take a minute to realize it.

never stop dreaming bigger

Life could be extremely hard and impossible especially out of your own comfort zone. We all have our comfort zones where we operate to our maximum, where we know most of the public and the public knows you and understands the culture, rules and regulations and different laws. The moment you are uprooted and planted elsewhere will you function just as well? Will you be able to still chase your dream and eventually live it?
It takes a strong personality and a drive. Once you have that passion to live, you will survive through the wilderness or even the flood. The greatest lesson I learnt was never to quit. My motto is, ” As long as I live I fight to conquer.” Even in my death bed, I would probably be able to still feed or bathe myself. That is the kind of fighter I discovered in me and intend to keep. You might have people around you telling you that you cannot make it or you are not meant for it. True, we are all never going to be president of the USA but that does not mean to stop trying. First of all if you are trying to become president of the USA you should associate with people of the like. You should already be involved in politics.
Growing up I wanted to become so many things in life. I still belive I could be each one of them if I put my mind to it. Determination goes a long way. I respect everyone that has attempted anything more than twice and are still back trying. That is the spirit of a winner. Realizing that the longest I could live is only about 120 years, I will encourage my children and my children’s children to start dreaming as soon as they can start sleeping for there isn’t so much time. Place yourself in the right direction no matter where you at. Set some goals and ask yourself what is your success plan and follow it faithfully. Anything that comes between you and your goal is your enemy and is not worth keeping around.
When I was going through nursing school I had to learn this the hard way. But the second and third time around I came back stronger and better. I learned my mistakes and above all never quit. I kept dreaming even after failing the first and second time.
Now I am happily living my dream but we can only dream bigger. You can be anything you want to become ONLY if you dream bigger.